I have no words for "triggers" and "maintainable" in the same sentence - enjoy your deadlocks and having no clue why a single write says "UPDATED x records" y times without having to dig down through an ancient UI.

I am actually "good" at this stuff - writing logic in SQL through triggers, which call functions (at which SQL Server is way better than PG is) and stored procs, etc, and it's just a horrible, horrible practice.