(Disclaimer: I'm an EE who has done non-for-hire house wiring, not an electrician. It is up to you to decide for yourself if my opinion concurs with anything else you've read, common sense, the laws of physics, etc. I presume you've obtained a generator at this time because you are indeed out of power and looking to get up and running quick, not for an ideal or best-prepared situation)
I personally wouldn't worry about a grounding rod if I was just running a few extension cords from the generator to power a handful of necessary things. The important thing is for all of the devices to be grounded back to the generator. This means 3 conductor cords for 3 prong devices, 4 conductor cords for 4 prong stove/dryer. 2 conductor non-polarized cords should be fine for modern 2-prong "double insulated" devices. In NO circumstance do you want to be using a 3-prong to 2-prong "cheater" adapters or anything similar.
Once you start talking about transfer switches and wiring it into your house, the picture completely changes. Unless you have experience doing house wiring, are up for dealing with live non-current-protected wires, and are open to learning something new while meticulously checking yourself, you really do want to talk to an electrician
I think I would hire an electrician but I'd still like to know the right way to do it. If you install a transfer switch could the generators ground be connected to the houses ground?
Generator's ground would definitely be connected to the house ground. I have not read the NEC in relation to generators. I would guess that neutral and ground should not be bonded together at the generator (this is a modification from how most generators come) and that if the generator is an appreciable distance from the service panel, another ground rod should be driven at the generator/interconnect.
I personally wouldn't worry about a grounding rod if I was just running a few extension cords from the generator to power a handful of necessary things. The important thing is for all of the devices to be grounded back to the generator. This means 3 conductor cords for 3 prong devices, 4 conductor cords for 4 prong stove/dryer. 2 conductor non-polarized cords should be fine for modern 2-prong "double insulated" devices. In NO circumstance do you want to be using a 3-prong to 2-prong "cheater" adapters or anything similar.
Once you start talking about transfer switches and wiring it into your house, the picture completely changes. Unless you have experience doing house wiring, are up for dealing with live non-current-protected wires, and are open to learning something new while meticulously checking yourself, you really do want to talk to an electrician